It's Rex Manning Day!

"Oh they tell me there's a place over yonder,
cool water running through the burning sand,
until we we learn to love one
another we never reach the promise land.

There's a hole in the world tonight.
There's a cloud of fear and sorrow.
There's a hole in the world tonight.
Don't let there be a hole in the world tomorrow"
-"Hole in the World," Eagles

Okay, so it's not actually Rex Manning day. I just like saying that it is. Always picks up my spirits. How is everything? Good, good. Spring break starts Friday. I'm not excited so much as relieved. I really need a break. I feel like my body is coming apart at the seams lately, and I'm really sick of spending my time off-campus in a shoddy, ramshackle, dirty old house. Thankfully I only have to pay my outrageous rent to live in that hole for another month.

Over the past week, I have finished two midterms, shot documentary footage of a walking tour of the town of Roseland with its self-appointed dictator, judged another speech tournament, driven to Valparaiso and back in the span of one morning, gone to several Richard III rehearsals, attended my first and only ND basketball game of my senior year, been almost completely wrong about every Academy Award, taken my car to Car-X three times without getting any work done on it, picked up trash in my backyard to avoid a fine twice, manged to go to mass at the Basilica twice and keep my Lenten promises (which are really hard), stayed up far into the morning and woken up before ten every day, and most recently popped a couple of DayQuil, which always does the same thing to me as NyQuil. Geez, no wonder I'm burnt out. And for anyone who wants to shut me up because they think they have a harder schedule than mine (more midterms, more practices, earlier times waking up), kiss my ass. It's not a competition, for one thing. And for another thing, I have at least one sleep disorder that makes me dog tired every day. So what I just listed is a lot for me.

Here's what's been distracting me from what I should have been thinking about (the above stuff):

-The Ocsars. I would like it known that the only category I went out on a limb for, I was right about. I may have gotten every other category wrong when I guessed on the night of the show, but that's beside the point. The only Best Picture nominee I saw won the award. I, therefore, undoubtedly have the most impeccable taste in movies imaginable. From now on, the only movies I will spend my time and money on will be low-brow, non-romantic comedies, comic book adaptations, and the Best Picture of every year. Mark it down. In all seriousness, I'm thinking of downloading all the major nominated films and watching them over break, then conducting my own awards to see if the Academy was right when they disagreed with my every instinct. Stay tuned for that.

-Chicago baseball. So the Sox aren't winning any games and the Cubs only have half of their starting rotation. None of it matters, it's spring training! It's just like the last dress rehearsal before a play: things have to go shitty or they won't work when it really matters. And even if he never gets healthy, I bet Kerry Wood could pitch while sitting on a chair all season and still win ten games. Really. Of course if he doesn't win at least 15 this year, I may personally shove that chair into a very uncomfortable place (the proverbial back of his Volkswagen, if you know what I mean). Trust me, the Cubs will win it all this year, then with all the curses out of the way, the Sox can resume their dynasty next season. All the pieces are falling right into place. And don't forget, Sox fans, Coco Crisp is still not a Cleveland Indian this year. So all is well.

-WWE. I'm getting really sick and tired of Vince McMahon getting the better of Shawn Michaels every single week. This feud is ridiculous--Shawn has not had one moment of victory or getting the upper hand on Vince since the boss starting fucking with him in December. Now they've gone so far as to let Vince and Shane get pinfall wins over him in one night. If I didn't know wrestling better, I would think that Shawn was the dumbest, most easily fooled pansy boy in wrestling history. Which is actually great storytelling on WWE's part if Shawn gives Vince his comeuppance at Wrestlemania. The problem is, I'm not entirely sure he will at this point; that's how extreme Vince's domination has gotten. Shawn's performance against Shane at Saturday Night's Main Event will be important in showing that HBK isn't just a pushover. Speaking of SNME, I am so totally geeked for that show. Actually, I'm more geeked about all the articles and video clips that have gone up in the hype for that show, because they have reunited me with the original SNME. That show provided some of the happiest (and saddest) moments of my life when I was a kid. Since I never got pay-per-view, it was the only time I could see Hulk Hogan wrestle. And nothing could match the excitement of staying up late on a Saturday night to see some earth-shattering development in WWE (which always seemed to happen when I watched). Plus I friggin' loved that theme music. If the new SNME can capture even a fraction of the divine aura that the original has in my memory, I think it will be a huge success. 25 days to Wrestlemania!

-The death of Kirby Puckett. I have never been, nor will ever be a Twins fan. But just the same, my lasting memories of Kirby Puckett will always be of an exuberant clutch performer who set a great example for the game of baseball. He is one soul who I can forgive for his apparent indiscretions late in life because he did so much to enrich our national pastime during his short time on this planet. And I know he's great, because he was my friend Coop's favorite player, and Coop is one of the purest and smartest baseball people I know. Kirby, you will be sorely missed.

-Barry Bonds. The truth may only now be painfully obvious, but my opinion of this man has not changed. Even if he wasn't a dirty cheater, he would still be a worthless piece of garbage with a black mark over his career. Now, thankfully, I have some concrete justification for that opinion, and for thinking that he should be kicked the hell out of baseball before he even has a chance to tarnish its most cherished record. As for after that, *activate Jim Mora voice* hall of fame? Hall of fame? No way in hell should he be in the hall of fame. So go poke your man-boobs elsewhere, Barry. The baseball world has zero patience left for you.

-Comics. After a poor showing the last time I made a trek to the funny book shop, things picked up a bit last week. I only grabbed two expensive issues, but I was a bit more pleased with my investment this time. Here's a quick look.

Batman Annual #25: I was a little irked by the reasoning behind Jason Todd's resurrection. While it flowed nicely with current DC events, I thought it was a bit of a stretch and it made me think that maybe no one had a good idea for why Jason was alive until recently. Plus it was a bit too cosmic for something that happened in the Batman continuity. Not that coming back from the dead is ever realisitc, but Batman has always been more grounded in the plausible than other DC books. So I expected something besides a fold in the space-time continuum being ripped open. Still, the rest of the book was gripping and powerful, making me really feel the angst that must have been necessary to turn Jason eeeeeevil. The only problem is now I wish I had read the Red Hood storyline, especially Batman #650. Oh, well, it will give me some back issues to look for over break. And kudos on the artist's nod to the alternate panel that never got printed in which Jason survived the blast. I was actually running that image through my head before I read the book, so it was cool to see it reproduced in full color. Grade: A-

Infinite Crisis #5: A lot of action considering there are so many plot threads dangling out there, but still not enough for my taste. The Superman confrontation with the nod to Action Comics #1 was way cool, as were the panels where Nightwing saw existence being splintered apart above him and the last page. Though the vast amount of plot that is being explored in the tie-in titles is annoying considering I only want to buy this book, I really like where all the pieces are being laid for the final confrontation. Batman's little strike team is particularly promising. The suspense for issue #6 is killing me, and that's right where I should be, so good work all around. Grade: A

Turn out the lights, the party's over! See you on the flipside.
~Jakeman